


I Wouldn't Change a Thing

by jqueen17



Category: Phandom
Genre: Feels, Fluff, M/M, Phanfiction, spy AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-07
Packaged: 2018-05-18 18:18:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5938330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jqueen17/pseuds/jqueen17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil had never been the sort of person to break the rules. He’d never been particularly paranoid, either, until he stumbled upon a mysterious boy who held the world’s secrets in his eyes. He didn’t know if he should run from him, even though his mind said he should. His heart told him he didn’t.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Wouldn't Change a Thing

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in response to a Spy AU prompt, so if you guys have any, please let me know! Also this is one of my shorter fics, but it was fun to write and I hope you guys like it:)

Phil   
Have you ever had the feeling that someone's watching you, even if you're sat in your own lounge, on your own couch?  
That’s the feeling I haven't been able to shake for the past two weeks straight. It's horrible, really, being constantly wary and paranoid of anyone you see on the street. And if you think that's bad, it's about a thousand times worse when you know you have something to be afraid of.  
The unknown is dangerous. The unknown can get you killed.  
Especially when you're not careful.

I wasn't a very careful person by nature. It really wasn't my fault; I was raised in a little town in Northern England that was one of those towns where everyone knew each other, and people didn't feel the need to constantly lock their doors.  
London was different. London was bustling and crowded and chaotic and, if we were being honest, terrifying. I felt safer in the country than in the city, because in the country, you had room to run. In the city, fight-or-flight turned into fight-or-die, and personally? I wasn't a fighter.   
So you can understand why I panicked at just about every sound I heard, all with an underlying suspicion that someone was watching me. It was probably unhealthy, but I didn't care. It was ruining my life.  
Louise thought I was nuts. Louise had been one of my closest friends for years, and she knew when something was bothering me.  
“Something wrong, Philly?”  
I shot her a look when she called me by the nickname she'd given me but eventually sighed. “Do you ever feel like you're being watched?”  
Her eyes darkened. Of course she had; everyone in the Queen’s personal intelligence team did. It came with the job. But we were trained to be able to spot suspicious people, people who posed a threat to the Queen. We weren't her guards, per say; no, we were (no offense) more important. We prepped the guards. Without us, they'd be all bullets and no brains.  
“You're serious? Do you think something’s wrong?”  
I shook it out of my mind, giving her a reassuring smile. There was no reason to alarm her. “No, no, I'm being silly.”  
She studied me for a moment longer before turning back to her computer, and I sighed, running a hand over my fringe. I needed a break.  
“I'm leaving early, alright? Cover my shift?”  
Louise rolled her eyes, but waved me off, and I kissed her head on the way out. She was the best.  
The weather had taken a turn for the worst, and as I walked to my flat, I regretted not bringing an umbrella. I hadn't expected it to rain.  
I also hadn’t expected to see a kid getting beat up by a group of thugs, either. My neighborhood wasn't good, necessarily, but it wasn't usually full of crime, so I was more than a little surprised.  
“Hey!” I called, and the group simultaneously turned to me. I gulped, worried that they would come after me instead, for being a witness or something. But they turned and ran, leaving the boy crumpled in the street. I jogged over to him, kneeling beside his bent frame and trying to assess the damage in the gloomy lighting.  
“Are you alright?”  
He flinched away from me instinctively, and my heart squeezed a little at his obvious vulnerability.  
“Hey. You're okay now. They're gone.”  
He hesitated for a moment before moving his arms from his face, and I held back a gasp at the bruises that littered his arms and the long slice on his bottom lip.  
“Come on. You need help.”  
I helped him to his feet, and he was so weak that he could barely help at all. Fortunately, my flat wasn't too terribly far away, and we made it to my door before he completely collapsed. With some coaxing, I managed to get him, soaking wet, to my couch. Since he didn't look like he'd be going anywhere soon, I went into my room, putting on some dry clothes and grabbing some for him, as well. When he had been laying in the street, he'd looked smaller than he actually was, and I was surprised to find that he was actually slightly taller and broader than I was.  
He was breathing slightly easier when I returned, but was assessing me with a strange look in his eyes, one I couldn't identify.  
“Here, put these on. You need to dry off so I can look at your injuries.”  
He did as I said, going into the bathroom to change. He was limping slightly, and looked so weak and exhausted that it pained me to look at him for more than a few seconds. When he didn't come out for awhile, I began to worry, quietly knocking on the door.  
“You alright in there?”  
He mumbled something unintelligible, and I decided to go in anyways. He had the sweatpants I'd given him on, but the T-shirt was still hanging in one hand, the other clenched against his left shoulder. He had managed to get his wet shirt off, and I had to stop myself from staring at his well-defined chest and slight abs.   
“Here, let me help.”  
He handed the shirt over to me, and I managed to get it over his left arm despite the fact that he could only raise it to chest-level.  
“Did they twist your arm or something?”  
He shook his head, and I finally heard him speak since I had seen him. His voice was raspy and pain-filled, but very articulate and pleasant nonetheless.  
“No, I don't remember them twisting it. One of them yanked on it, though, and I think it wrenched a muscle or something. It's fine, honestly.”  
I didn't believe him, but his lip was still bleeding pretty steadily, so I figured I should clean that up first. I had him sit on the couch, retrieving a wet washcloth from the kitchen, and an ice pack.  
“Hold still.”  
He did as I said, and I dabbed at his cut gently, causing him to flinch slightly. I couldn't help but notice how beautiful his face was, despite the black eye and busted lip. His eyes were a deep, golden brown, and his lips were red and full, so of course I caught myself staring.  
“Um, what's your name?”  
He blinked, looking surprised. He'd been staring as well. “Dan.”  
I nodded, giving him a smile. “I'm Phil. Can I look at your shoulder?”  
He nodded, turning around and trying to pull his shirt off, failing. I chuckled, tugging it up over one shoulder and gently removing it from the injured one. His back was just as defined as his chest, and since he wasn't looking, I did allow myself to stare for a moment before pressing my hands right below his shoulder joint, making him flinch away.  
“It'll probably hurt a little at first. Do you want to lie down?”  
“No, thanks though. Go ahead; I'm ready now.”  
I shrugged, beginning to work the tension out of his muscles. He did hiss out a few curse words at first, but eventually let out a sigh, the pain clearly subsiding.   
“Fuuuuucccckkkk…” He moaned at one point, and I stopped, obviously alarmed.   
“Does it hurt?” I asked, and he shook his head rapidly, taking a deep breath.  
“Sorry. It felt good, I just-sorry.”  
I laughed for real that time, and he did as well, his shoulders shaking slightly. When I was convinced he had no more random knots in his muscles, I handed him the shirt, and he put it on with ease.  
“Hey, thank you. I didn't say that earlier, but I would've been dead if it weren't for you.”  
I smiled, noticing that his eyes were strangely bright and his cheeks pink. I put my hand against his head, almost immediately snatching it back.   
“Well, I didn't save you from a fever. You need to lay down.”  
Dan nodded, laying back and closing his eyes. His face was still pinched with pain, and I went to the kitchen to get him some aspirin. When I walked back into the lounge, his eyes were scanning the room, landing on the pills with a look of dread.   
“Oh, um, I'm actually fine. I don't need those.”  
I chuckled at his expression, sitting beside him on the couch and handing him the glass of water. “You do.”  
He sighed, placing his palm flat in the air, and I set the three little capsules in it. He glared at them for a long, drawn out moment before throwing them back and chugging the water, coughing a little at the end.  
“I hate pills,” he explained to my amused expression. I nodded, not pressing him further. He visibly relaxed a few minutes later, his eyes struggling to stay open.  
“You can go to sleep. I'll just sit out here and watch TV or something for a little bit.”  
He nodded, falling into a deep sleep mere moments after I'd given him permission. I took this as an opportunity to wonder about him, about who he was, and about why I didn't feel like I was being watched anymore. Maybe it was having someone else in my big, empty flat. Maybe it was because, for whatever reason, I felt better having Dan there. I didn't know him at all, but that didn't mean I didn't want to. He was intriguing, and his eyes held secrets and thoughts that I would love to hear. I didn't remember falling asleep, but when I woke up, I realized that I had fallen asleep on Dan. My head was on his chest, the rest of my body still in a sitting position, and I was overcome with embarrassment when I saw that he was already awake. I instantly jumped up, trying to compose myself.  
“I'm so sorry, I didn't know I'd fallen asleep.”  
His lips twitched like he wanted to smile, and when he couldn't hold it back any longer, a tiny smirk appeared on one side of his mouth, causing a dimple to dent his cheek.  
“Am I that irresistible? Wow, I guess everyone was right.”  
I knew he was joking, but that didn't stop my face from heating up and his smile to spread across his face in a grin.  
“Ha ha, very funny.”  
He held up his hands in an ‘I can't help myself’ gesture, and I shook my head, laughing as I walked into the kitchen.  
“Do you want some cereal?”  
“Sure, thanks.”  
I made us each a bowl of Shreddies, trying to get the nerve to ask him some questions about himself. I was dying of curiosity, but I was such a chicken that as I sat beside him and handed him his bowl, I simply flipped the TV channel to an anime I hadn't seen and hoped he liked anime. Apparently he did, because we ate our breakfast in silence and only made comments on the episode when necessary. It was nice, really, having company as you did everyday routines. Dan looked completely at ease as well, and I smiled at his chaotic hair.  
“I wish my hair would curl.”  
He scowled when he saw me staring at his messy bed head, running a hand over it in vain.  
“Right, well, you can have whatever biological factor makes mine curl. I'll take yours, gladly.”  
We laughed for a moment before he started messing with his hair again, eventually giving up and sighing.  
“You wouldn't happen to have a straightener, would you?”  
I nodded, gesturing for him to follow me to my room. I rummaged in some drawers, telling him to go ahead and grab clothes out of the closet. After he had done that and I had located my straightener (not that I ever needed one, but I was glad I had it now), he took everything into the bathroom, and I heard the shower turn on a few moments later. I didn't really have anything to do while I waited, so I gave myself a sort of pep-talk to work up the courage to ask him what had happened last night. It couldn't be too hard; if I made a fool of myself, oh well, I'd probably never see him again after he left. That thought made my heart hurt a little, so I stopped thinking about him leaving and started thinking about how much I already liked him. Which probably wasn't the best choice, but who could blame me? The guy was amazing.   
And of course, I caught myself staring once again as he returned to the lounge, dressed head to toe in black, his hair perfectly flat.  
“Nice outfit.”  
He held his arms up from his sides, modeling the only black clothing I owned. They suit him better anyways.  
“Why thank you. I can’t bring myself to wear anything else voluntarily.”  
I took a deep breath, asking my first question as he sat beside me. “How come?”  
He glanced at me briefly, and shrugged, thinking about it for a moment before answering. I got the feeling that he was choosing his words carefully, but the honesty was evident in his words.  
“Monochrome is the only fashion choice I feel acceptable to wear every day. At least for me. You, on the other hand, look great in bright colours.”  
I smiled down at my bright blue t-shirt and mismatched yellow socks, and Dan was nodding appreciatively at them as well. “I could never pull that off.”  
“Sure you could. In red, maybe, or like a dark orange.”  
Dan thought it over, nodding in agreement. “I suppose. Probably not going to try that out anytime soon, though.”  
We laughed over his obviously dubious and dismissive tone, and it was his turn to ask questions. He was a lot braver than I was, not even hesitating.  
“So what do you do for a living, Phil?”  
I blinked in surprise; it was a sort of odd question, considering we’d just met. Maybe he was just curious, as well. I wouldn’t blame him if he was.  
“Um, I work for the government, actually.”  
Dan’s eyebrows went up. “You mean for the Queen?”  
I nodded, wondering if I needed to keep my mouth shut. I knew close to nothing about Dan; I had to keep reminding myself that, because he just had a familiar feel about him. But he seemed so innocent, so harmless, and his eyes were so adorably curious that I decided I could trust him. Who would he tell, anyway?  
“Well, yes. But not, like, directly. Okay, sort of directly. I’m a part of her intelligence agency.”  
Dan nodded, seeming impressed.  
“What about you?”  
Dan paused again, eventually sighing. “Well, I don’t work for Her Majesty, that’s for sure. Actually, I don’t work for anyone now.”  
I looked at his face in confusion, waiting for him to continue. He didn’t for a few moments, his face troubled, and I waited patiently, not wanting to push him on an obviously sensitive topic. When he finally spoke, his voice had taken on a serious tone, and he didn’t meet my eyes as he explained.  
“I was a waiter at a club, you’d probably know the one-it’s the most famous in London-and my boss made a new feature ‘shirtless wait staff’. Well, you can probably imagine how that went as a whole, but for me it went a lot...worse, than I’d planned.”  
I studied his face, and he closed his eyes before going on. “There was a girl that wanted me to give her more than food, and I told her off. She just… basically attacked me, and her boyfriend caught her with her tongue down my throat and her hands… all over me. That’s who those guys were; her boyfriend, and his gang, I guess. But that’s the reason I got fired; she filed a complaint against me.”  
I put a hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him. “That’s awful, Dan. I’m sorry-you didn’t deserve that.”  
He nodded, attempting to give me a smile. “Thanks. But I don’t have any place to go now; I lived in the apartment above the club, but since my boss owned the place… I don’t think I can go back.”  
I scooted closer to him, putting my arms around him and hugging him to my chest. I didn’t know where this sudden burst of confidence came from, but I didn’t even hesitate, and he hugged me back after a few moments of shock.  
“You can stay here for as long as you need to. I don’t want you going back there; not now, and not ever.”  
He nodded against my shoulder, and I thought he was crying, but his voice was clear when he responded. “Thank you, Phil. You don’t know how much this means to me.”  
I squeezed him in a hug once more before letting him go, and he smoothed a hand over his hair like I did when I was embarrassed. I let him have a moment to himself, going into the kitchen to make some soup for lunch. A few moments later, however, I heard Dan mumbling quietly, and I stuck my head around the corner of the lounge, wondering who he was talking to.  
“No, you weren’t supposed to be that convincing! Bloody hell, are you fucking crazy?”  
I pressed my back to the wall, listening to his angry, hushed tone. I knew eavesdropping was wrong, but I was curious to the point of disrespecting his privacy. He sounded absolutely pissed, and I wanted to know why, and at whom.  
“Well, what the fuck am I supposed to do now, genius?”  
After a few moments of silence, he nearly yelled, and I jumped despite the fact that he couldn’t see me.  
“Absolutely not! No. Not now I’m not. He doesn’t deserve that.”  
I sucked in a breath. Who was he talking to?  
“Fine. Go right ahead. And no, I will not. I’ll do what I feel necessary; I’m in charge of this job, not you. So fuck you, too.”  
I heard his footsteps coming towards the kitchen, so I practically ran towards the boiling soup, stirring it and trying to look casual.  
“Smells great in here.”  
Dan’s voice was perfectly calm and collected, and I laughed awkwardly. Kicking myself, I shut up, knowing I was acting jumpy. I just couldn’t get the conversation out of my head. Who didn’t deserve it? Deserve what? And just what kind of ‘job’ was he in charge of?  
All these questions rolled through my mind, and I got a prickly feeling on the back of my neck. Dan was staring at me.  
“You said you were just a waiter?” I blurted, my heartbeat speeding up. Dan made a sound of confirmation, and I nodded, knowing he was looking at me. But I couldn’t look at him; I was afraid if I did, he’d see that I’d heard almost the entirety of his conversation. I poured the soup into two bowls, walking past Dan into the lounge, all without making eye contact. I sat his bowl on the table, staring at the TV as I ate my own. He sat beside me, and I could tell he kept glancing at me, but I was on a mission not to acknowledge him. If I did, I was afraid he’d know everything.  
“Something wrong, Phil?”  
His voice sounded so concerned that I had to look at him, and it was a mistake. His eyes were so beautiful, and I couldn’t stop staring at his face. His sweet, concerned face that was obviously not hiding anything from me. Right?  
“No, of course not. I’m just tired; as comfortable as your chest was, I think I need to sleep in a bed.”  
He grinned, his dimples appearing and melting my heart, along with my doubts about his trustworthiness.  
God, I hoped I was right about him.

When it was about dinner time, I couldn’t sit still any longer, and told Dan I was going to make a call. He waved at me, concentrating on Halo, which I had found and we had been playing for a few hours now.  
I was calling Louise. I had no other option at this point, and I needed someone else’s opinion.  
“Hello?”  
“Hey, Lou,” I murmured. Even though I was in the hall, I was still worried Dan would hear me.  
“What’s wrong, sweetie?”  
I took a deep breath, telling her in one long streaming rant. “So I found this guy getting the shit beat out of him last night, and so I helped him to my flat and cleaned him up and he’s been through hell, Louise, but he called someone today and it was a really shady call and I’m worried he isn’t telling me everything.”  
Louise didn’t respond for a moment, and I waited anxiously for her response. When she answered, it was everything I hadn’t been expecting.  
“Get him drunk.”  
“What?” I wondered if I’d just imagined her words, but she explained, and my mouth actually fell open in shock.  
“Get him drunk. People spill their darkest secrets when they’re wasted, and it’ll be even better if he has a low tolerance for alcohol. Trust me, I’ve done this to, like, forty guys since I was 17. It works like a charm.”  
“Louise, that’s awful,” I said, and I could hear her huff of exasperation.   
“Quit being a wuss, Phil. But while you’re doing that, what’s the kid’s name? I’ll look him up for you, just in case you’re right about him.  
“Dan. I don’t know his last name, but I think one of the guys that was hitting him last night said ‘Howard’ or ‘Howell’ or ‘Hill’, or something along those lines. He has brown hair and brown eyes and he’s adorable.”  
Louise’s voice was teasing when she responded, and I was glad she couldn’t see me blush.  
“Aww, Phil, do you like him???”  
“Shut up.”  
She hung up laughing, and I prepared myself for my night of getting a guy a barely knew shitfaced. I shook my head, appalled with myself right now. But I supposed it was necessary, and that’s the thought I hung on to as I went back into the lounge, Dan still playing Halo.  
“Hey, I know how I can cheer you up,” I suggested, and Dan paused the game, looking at me curiously.  
“And what’s that?”  
I grinned, trying to look mysterious. I told him to grab a coat from my room, and we had gone all the way to the subway before his curiosity got the best of him.  
“Seriously, Phil, where are we going?”  
“You’ll seeeeee,” I sang, but I was disgusted with my surprisingly great acting skills. If he had nothing to hide… I’d never forgive myself.  
When we got to my favorite pub, Dan looked at me in amusement. “Oh, I see. Trying to get me to drink away my problems.”  
I shrugged, worried that he would protest. But he led the way inside, ordering us two drinks and choosing a spot at the bar, completely comfortable. We downed two whole glasses before he said anything, already sounding slightly tipsy. I thanked the heavens I had never been easily affected by alcohol, and ordered us some shots. Why not make this interesting?  
“So, Phil,” he slurred, trying to sound coherent but failing. “What made you stop those guys from kicking my ass completely?”  
I shrugged, both of us taking a shot before answering. “You needed help. I wasn’t going to just walk by.”  
“I would have.”  
I blinked in surprise, sipping my fourth mug of whatever we had ordered. Dan wasn’t done, however, and downed the rest of his glass before continuing.  
“Well, I mean, if it were you I would have.”  
My eyebrows went up. He was already letting things slip, and I had to resist the urge to text Louise and tell her she was a genius.  
Another shot. “And why is that?”  
“You’re cute as hell.”  
I nodded, accepting it. I knew he meant it, too-alcohol made people honest, I had discovered.  
“Well, thank you. You’re cute too, but I couldn’t see your face when I yelled at those guys.”  
“I know.”  
He sounded about as drunk as he could get, but I ordered another glass and another shot, just in case. “How do you know.”  
“Well, that was the plan, silly.”  
My heart just about stopped. “What plan?”  
He chugged his drink back, took the shot, and got unsteadily to his feet. “I’ll tell you when we get back home.”  
I nodded, and the trip ‘home’ was eventful. Helping a drunk person walk was… Well, not fun. Interesting. But mostly problematic. If my goal for the evening was to get Dan drunk, I had went above and beyond, because while I got the feeling he didn’t usually babble and giggle and sway, he was sure doing a lot of that right now.   
Once we had made it to my flat, Dan had convinced himself that he wanted to bake a cake.  
“Come on, Phil! It’ll be fun!”  
I put my hands on his shoulders, forcing him to look at me. “Dan, what plan were you talking about earlier? I’ll bake a cake with you if you answer my questions.”  
He’d been pouting until that last part, a grin blossoming on his face. “Well, why didn’t you just say that earlier? My partners need information on the Queen, and you’re the easiest way to obtain the information. Duh.”  
I stared at him in silence until he leaned in, pressing his lips to mine. I was so surprised that I didn’t pull away, letting him push me back against the counter.  
“But they hadn’t planned on me liking you.”  
I couldn’t help kissing him back; I wasn’t completely in control either, and let’s face it; I wanted it s much as he did. When he spoke again, we were both out of breath, and he moved his lips to my neck, giving us both a few seconds to catch our breath.  
“And I hadn’t planned on you being so nice. I figured government officials weren’t, but you’re...wow.”  
His mouth crashed into mine again, and I had to pull his hair away from me to make him stop.  
“Dan, am I in danger?”  
He settled on kissing my neck again, since I wasn’t letting him kiss my lips, and his voice was raspy and desperate when he responded.  
“They probably want you dead, yeah. But I won’t let them get to you; I was in charge of spying on you.”  
I froze, but Dan didn’t notice, continuing running his hands down my chest and kissing me with such passion that I couldn’t not believe him. I kissed him back solidly for a few moments before breaking away again, going to my room.  
“Go to sleep, Dan. Sleep it off.”  
But he followed me into my room, sitting on the bed before I turned out the light.  
“Aww, Phil, don’t be mad at me.”  
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not mad. Just tired. You go to sleep in here-I’ll sleep in the living room.”  
His small “okay” nearly broke my heart, but I shut the door, feeling like crying as I lay on the couch. I liked Dan. A lot.  
But I couldn’t like a terrorist.

That morning was tense. I made breakfast, trying to forget last night, all the while hoping Dan didn’t remember anything.  
It was a lot to hope for.  
For someone who had gotten about as drunk as I’d ever seen someone get, Dan was surprisingly coherent that morning, and that early. He sat at the bar, obviously watching me and not trying to hide it, either.  
“Phil.”  
I ignored him, continuing making breakfast with about as much concentration I think I’d ever put into anything, ever. I heard Dan sigh, and his words were loud in the tense silence.  
“Phil, please look at me.”  
I didn’t, and a few moments later I heard his stool rattle on the floor, feeling his presence at my back. I automatically flinched away when I felt his hand touch my back, and I spun around, my blood running cold at the sight of him. His eyes were dark, something I couldn’t identify brewing a storm in them, and he took a step forward, pressing me against the counter with sheer intimidation.  
“Are you scared of me?” He asked, amusement and something darker in his voice. My throat closed up, and I shook my head, not fooling him. He leaned forward, and I closed my eyes, trying not to panic.  
“Why,” He murmured in my ear, and I thought he was going to kiss me for a moment before thinking that was ridiculous, he was probably plotting my murder. He must have guessed my thoughts, because he looked me in the eye, smiling and softly speaking in a comforting voice.  
“Phil, I would never hurt you. I wasn’t joking when I said you saved my life. I think my partners were about fed up with me, because that wasn’t part of the plan. The plan was for you to hear them threatening me, not using me as a punching bag. So please, don’t look at me like I’m some sort of killer.”  
“But you are,” I whispered, and I saw the hurt flash across his face. But I went on, figuring that if I was going to die I might as well die brave. “You’re a terrorist. A spy. You want the Queen dead, or you work for people who do. I’m supposed to kill people like you. Is any of what you told me true?”  
He flinched, and I immediately regretted my question.  
“All of it besides the gang. My boss caught us and jumped to conclusions that I was the one to blame, and she got right on that blame train, so I got fired.” He paused, thinking something over. “Would you kill me or rat on me if I gave you the chance?”  
I opened my mouth to reply, but couldn’t. Both of us knew the answer.  
“What’s so special about me that you wouldn’t turn me in, Phil?”  
I shook my head, not wanting to answer. But his eyes made me weak, so innocent and kind and everything but evil. “You’re not bad. I know that, somehow, you don’t want to hurt anyone.”  
He nodded, looking ashamed. “You’re right. But it’s not easy to get out of what I’m involved in.”  
“Tell me,” I breathed. “I can help.”  
Dan’s eyes were flickering across my face, clearly wanting to believe me but not fully trusting what I’d said. I made myself relax, leaning forward and pressing my lips to his. He fell into the kiss, and this one was different, softer than the ones last night. His hands went up to touch my face, his fingers searing my skin where they pressed against my cheek and neck, and I wrapped my arms around his waist, pulling him closer.  
My phone ringing made us both jump, and I answered it, breathing heavily.  
“Hello?”  
“Phil, he’s a spy. You need to get out of there.”  
I was still staring at Dan, and he was looking at me so helpless and desperate that I took a moment to respond, keeping eye contact with him as I did.  
“No, he’s here to bring that group down. They’ve been using him and he escaped. Trust me.”  
A few tears spilled out of Dan’s eyes, but he smiled, reaching forward and grabbing my hand.  
“Phil, you’re sure? This is serious.”  
“I’m sure.”

After Dan had given me the details and secrets of the group he’d been involved with, I called Louise again, and she relayed the information to the rest of the team. Before the week had ended, the entire group had been infiltrated, and Dan and I were credited with saving the Queen. I eventually introduced him to Louise, who studied him with appreciative eyes.  
“I can see why Phil likes you. You’re a cutie.”  
Dan had laughed, blushing, and began his training to be a part of the intelligence agency a few days later. He had an IQ higher than anyone else on the team, which was a huge feat unto itself. 

I’d never expected my life to go the way it did, I’ll be honest. I’d say the moral of the story is to be nice to everyone and you might save a life (well, two lives actually, not to mention one of them was the Queen’s), but it’s not. The moral of the story is to trust your gut instinct. Even if it’s crazy. I thought I was crazy, every time I thought about the fact that Dan had once been a spy. An assassin. Someone to be feared. I’d even thought I was crazy when I came out to my friends and family, and half of them said I was stupid for choosing to be this way. But Dan reassured me that I was perfect, that I wasn’t crazy and that I could feel however I wanted to. And I knew he was right. But so was everyone else, to an extent. I had chosen to do the things I did. Help a stranger on the street, in the middle of London, despite the obvious danger that entailed. Trust Dan Howell, a person whose very profession was the opposite of everything I was supposed to trust. Loving him, despite his flaws, and despite the fact that he was male. It was all my choice, and all my fault.  
And I could care less.  
I was happy with my choices. I;d never been as happy and content with anyone as much as I was with Dan. He was my opposite, my other half, and gender and past decisions really didn’t affect that. At least to me. People were going to judge, and it was going to sting, and knowing me, I’d probably get really upset about, at least for a brief period of time.  
But in the end, I wouldn’t have changed a thing.


End file.
